Finding Myself...in Nepal...The Seven Truths I Learnt

Its been a while since I have written anything in this travel blog and as part of my non-existent New Year Resolutions I have decided that I will write a little more than NEVER. For those of you who have already checked out my photos of my trip to Nepal on this website and on Facebook, you might perhaps know that I did spend seven days in Nepal at the end of December 2008. Ever since a young age I have been quite attract to the region in which Nepal is located. I still remember watching half of Seven Years in Tibet in 1997; ten years after my first visit to Nepal as a kid. I think I also remember a movie starring Rishi Kapoor in which he is in Nepal for some reason or the other. These two half events in my life touched me deeply…that coupled with the low price of air tickets convinced me that I SHOULD GO TO NEPAL. A quick search on the internet will also reveal to you that not a lot of photos are available about the place that most lovers have talked about at some point in time or the other…

So, on the 20th of December after wasting enough time walking around malls in Dubai I finally decided to spend the remaining Seven days of my holidays in Nepal. What I discovered however was nothing short of a journey of self-discovery. I saw and discovered SEVEN TRUTHS. The following is the account of how I FOUND MYSELF IN NEPAL…


Found Myself on a Cultural Journey

For me I wanted to experience all things Nepali in Nepal. As part of this quest I was looking for as much culture as I could get my hands on. I was in Pokhara for a few days and was waking up and down the high street. While I was doing this, I heard a very nice Nepali Folk song coming from a restaurant just ahead of me. I saw the familiar branding of Coca Cola and the bright lights flashing with the sound of a generator in the background. I decided to give the restaurant a try as part of my efforts to sample the local cuisine.

When I entered the passageway, I was not greeted in the usual way most tourists are when then enter a shop, restaurant or travel agency. There was no warm welcome and no, “NAMASTE”. I was a little taken aback and had half a mind not to spend my Tourist Dollars eating there. However the Nepali folk music beckoned me. So I asked the three waiters where I should go to…the first floor or the ground floor. They gave me a dirty stare and told me to go and sit in the ground floor.

I followed their instructions thinking that my hard earned tourist dollars would not be wasted on a tip if service continued in the same way as their welcome. I waked in and was now surrounded by three young waitresses. I asked to be seated. The restaurant was empty. At this point, my eyes suddenly spotted a girl on a stage wearing a pair of jeans and a bright blue t-shirt dancing provocatively on the stage at the front of the restaurant. In a fraction of a second I realized that I was indeed in a DANCE BAR. As an unmarried young(reasonably young) Indian Male…I could only have two possible reactions. The first would have been to have ensured I walked in with enough small change to be able to throw at the dancer and those to follow, or get my ass out of there before someone who knows my mother sees me there.

Before I could make flight however I was escorted to a table…I refused to sit there because of its proximity to the dancer…and went to a far away location in the restaurant. I then asked for a menu and started reading it carefully. I had worked out in my head that all I needed to do was to say that I wanted something that was not on the menu and then I could just leave without bringing to light the fact that I had actually walked in there my mistake to listen to Nepali Folk Music. I spent a good 3 minutes looking at the menu. Unfortunately, they served, Indian, Chinese, Continental and even American Food. Thankfully they did not have Momo’s…so that’s what I asked for…they said they did not have them…and so I said…OK…then I am leaving. However what I had not noticed was the fact that while I was looking at the menu to order something they did not have, they realized that I was an Indian and the girl in the Jeans and T-shirt was now dancing to Himesh Reshammiya’s Jhalak Dikhlaja. As I was making my way out in a hurry, in the passage way, I crossed a Punjabi Couple from India with their two little children entering the same restaurant. They seem to have heard the familiar hindi song and had decided to give the restaurant a try. I had half a mind to tell them that a DANCE BAR was no place for little children…but then decided to just walk away and let them explain to their kids for the next few years about what that Aunty in the Jeans and T-shirt was doing…


Found Myself seeing inflation in action

The very first thing I FOUND when I landed in Nepal was that you get to see a rather slow economic phenomenon, “INFLATION”, live in action at speeds that make Formula 1 cars look like snails out for a stroll after the rains. As a tourist the moment I landed in Kathmandu, I was greeted with, “Sir, I give you good price.” This statement echoes nation wide and was the only thing I heard as often as the Namaste used to greet tourists and locals alike. I soon discovered that the stronger the FAKE accent, the HIGHER is the price of the product or service on sale. I found that as soon as a shop keeper or travel agent knows that you are a foreigner, (which is not very difficult to tell) prices inflate at the speed of light. Let me give you a few examples. I was travelling from Kathmandu to Chitwan in the south of Nepal and we stopped for a cup of tea and breakfast. Before I could place my order for tea, a whole bunch of American tourists came in like a storm and surrounded the make-shift cash register of the restaurant. They asked for tea…then explained they wanted – “NEPALI TEA”…another one asked for coffee…then explained she wanted – “NEPALI COFFEE”. The price stated for them was Rs. 40. When they left and the inflation storm had passed, I asked for tea…JUST TEA…The price I got was Rs. 20. Later I spoke to my driver who told me that he paid them Rs. 5 and left. (By the Way…Nepali Tea and Nepali Coffee is nothing but MILK added in your Tea or coffee)

This incident brought to light the fact that there are actually Four prices in Nepal. The first is the “White Tourist Rate”. This is the HIGHEST and usually cannot be negotiated. The second is the “Indian Tourist Initial Rate”. This is way lower than the “White Tourist Rate” but can be negotiated. The third price is the “Indian Tourist Negotiated Rate”. This can be as low as a third of the price initially quoted under the “Indian Tourist Initial Rate”. The fourth and final rate is the “Actual Rate”. This is the real price that a Nepali would pay for a product or service. This is usually a tenth of the “White Tourist Rate”.

I found the Inflationary Storm hit me at many places. For example when I was booking a taxi to travel between cities I was told that petrol was very expensive in Nepal and hence prices were high. One travel agent told me that petrol costs $2 in Nepal. A dollar is equal to Rs. 76(Nepali Rupees). This would mean that according to him, a liter of petrol was Rs. 152. When I later checked, the printed price at the Petrol bunk is Rs. 85 and while I was in Nepal the price fell to Rs. 80.

The inflationary storm does not stop with just the price of petrol when you are booking a car. I was told that cars in Nepal are expensive. A later investigation into that fact proved that cars were indeed expensive because of the tax on imports. However I was told that the car I wanted to book cost Rs. 1.3 million to import from India. Anyone from India who hears this DOES NOT EXPECT to be sitting in a Maruti 800 after hearing that PRICE TAG. REALLY…1.3 Million for a Maruti 800…a car that sells in India for less than Three Hundred Thousand…but then again…that’s the Inflationary Storm…later I found that the car actually costs Eight Hundred Thousand in Nepal…a price far lower than what was used to convince me to pay more for my car rental.

One thing that is cheaper in Nepal is international roaming on your mobile phone. This is usually because your home network does not work there and you are forced not to call people. :-)


Found myself discovering my true colors

Let me come clean on this one…I was in Nepal on a photographic expedition. I just wanted to take as many photos of the land as I possibly could. When I got back to Dubai I realized that I had shot the equivalent of 76 rolls of film. When I landed in Nepal, all I had was a change of clothes and my camera bag. My camera bag holds all my lenses and a laptop and has a pouch for my passport and airline tickets. This meant that wherever I went, I went with this big bag. On my trip I was mistaken by a lot of people for many things that I perhaps wasn’t. While I was at the Domestic Airport, I had at least 3 foreigners come up to me and ask me questions about Nepal. When I got to talk to one of them, I realized that she thought I was a Nepali Tour Guide because of my bag and warm jacket. Quite to the contrary when I met Nepalis, they always mistook me for a professional photographer. In fact as a “Professional Photographer”, I did witness a little escalation in my social status in Nepal along with a corresponding increase in prices.

But I digress…as a “Professional Photographer” I wanted to capture the essence of what is 'Nepal'. This meant that I took a lot of photographs of people…lots of people…lots of tourists…and…lots of Indians. I soon realized that it is very easy to spot an Indian Tourist in Nepal. We are always dressed in BRIGHT colors and each item of clothing is a completely different colour. As a pseudo elitist I had myself convinced that this applied only to Indian Tourists from India and as someone who was coming to Nepal from Dubai, I was an exception.

Having said that, I did eventually discover my true colours when I was in Nepal. I was sitting with the Manager of the resort I was staying at in Chitwan in Southern Nepal and he was telling me about the jungle safari we were to be on in the next few hours. He explained to me the species of animals we might see and the birds that frequent the National Park. After a few awkward moments of silence, he finally built up the courage to tell me what he REALLY wanted to. He told me that my clothes were TOO BRIGHT and that I might scare the animals or even make them aggressive. There you go…I was not an exception…I was the rule.


Found Myself becoming one with Nature only to realize I am an Urban Junkie

After covering up my BRIGHT SCARY clothes, I set out on my first Jungle Safari in Nepal. I must confess, I initially thought that the people at the resort who explained to me about my package trip had bad grammar. They told me that we were going into the Jungle "to see Rhino". And then they told me we are going "to watch the bird". I later realized that they did not have bad grammar…they were infact telling me the truth. I went to the jungle with them…and guess what I saw…A RHINO…ONE…and he/she looked quite bored. The next morning we went Bird Watching…that statement was NOT just grammatically correct…it was also the TRUTH. We saw…ONE BIRD. Ok…TWO…but the second was THE COMMON CROW…as an Indian I DO NOT PAY money to see the Crow…and definitely NOT the COMMON CROW.

I did however enjoy all my jungle safaris. I went on a Jeep Safari…and then a walk in the jungle…and a ride in a canoe to "see crocodile". (Yes ONE CROCODILE)…and even went on an Elephant Safari. I politely refused the Camel Safari though…the way I look at it…you don’t go from a DESERT to the MOUNTAINS to sit on a camel and check out the RHINO…its just not done…at least not with my tourist dollars.


The Elephant Safari however was the highlight of the trip. I got to see…THE OTHER RHINO as well…That took the total of animals I saw to three. Sitting on the elephant back however I got to thinking about what goes through the mind of the Rhino when he is eating grass and 35 elephants with tourists surround him? I got to thinking about the domesticated elephants as well….do they have LESS respect with Wild Elephants in the Jungle? Do the elephants and the rhino hang out in the jungle together and make fun of the camel when he goes out on the safari? What do you call it when an elephant has a cold and is blowing his nose? (Blowing his own trumpet of course) How do male elephants respond when a female elephant says, "Darling do I have a big butt?" Do elephants ever go on a diet? Are professional model elephants skinny?

I finally came to the conclusion that I am an Urban Junkie. I like going to the zoo and being able to see 300 animals for AED 4($1). Yes I am a disgrace to all nature lovers. I think I took more photos or people drinking Coca Cola on the elephant backs than I did of animals and trees. I am the kind of guy who goes to an aquarium to see 600 species of fish in 15 minutes…my only exposure to nature is stopping my car by the side of a tree on the highway and drinking coconut juice. Yes…I am ashamed of me too.

I discovered Nepal the Lazy Way. I did not trek to the Himalayas…I took a plane to see Mt. Everest. I did not go to tourist hang outs…I went to vegetable markets that were close by for photographs. I did not pay my models…I would instead take a photo of theirs on my digital camera and then would show it to them as an incentive for them to pose for me again and again for free…that’s how I got those photos…and if you are even for a moment thinking that I stayed in a tent…think again…I changed hotel rooms because the heater would not work. Yes I am ashamed of me too.


Found myself becoming brand conscious

Its funny how Nepal made me discover that I was actually brand conscious. Nepal has very interesting names of shops and brands. You will find that most brands are inspired by the things in close proximity. I found a brand called Everest Beer. All through my journey of discovery I kept thinking of tag lines for them…”Everest Beer – You can’t Get Higher than This”…”Everest Beer – Serve Chilled”…”Everest Beer – Makes you feel you’re on top of the world.” Sadly I never got to drink the beer.

I found some strange names of shops as well…”Western Women Paper Crafts” I am sure they were thinking…let’s just get to the point. “Up E Stairs”…hmmm..."WOW REAL FOOD"...Yum Yum..


But the classic for me was when I was doing a little bit of shopping. I came across and underwear brand called - 'Visa Chi'. When you say that together…what does it sound like? Yup you got it right… Move over Versace and Milan…here comes Visa Chi and Kathmandu…


Found myself cracking top secret business strategies

I discovered some very interesting business strategies in use in Nepal. When I landed in Pokhara, I asked my taxi driver what was there to see in town. He told me…SUNRISE. When someone tells you that for the first time, it makes you wonder…how is it that their Sunrise or Sunset is better that the one I can see from the 7th floor of my building? So I decided to investigate. I booked a Sunrise at my hotel. (YES…you have to book…) At 4:30am my taxi driver came to pick me up. On the way he told me that I will be approached my tour guides and should just refuse their services. So when I land at my sunrise destination, I ignored the calls of the guides. I did however note a very interesting strategy…when they knew that I was Indian, they would look through their phones and then play an Indian song for me on speaker phone. Coincidentally I heard, Jhalak Dikhlaja. Thankfully the sun was not up as yet and so under the cover of darkness I was able to hide my exploits of the previous night. Later Americans passed by and the song on the mobile phone changed to Akon’s Lonely. When the Americans refused the service of a guide, the guide magically transformed into a porter and offered to carry bags. I would have intervened and offered the Americans the friendly advice my taxi driver gave me…but I was unsure if the “Jhalak Dikhlaja” was pure coincidence or a haunting remained from the movie, “I KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST NIGHT AT THE DANCE BAR.”

Nepal is full of shops that sell spiritual music and artifacts. You will find that most of them are well stocked in Buddhist and Hindu spiritual music. These shops are mostly frequented by foreigners who are on a quest for deeper spiritual understanding. I did however witness something I found rather amusing. I saw two well dressed tourists enter one of these shops. Since I was in the Café just opposite them, I got to see all that was happening. They entered and were then surrounded by three of the men in the shop. After a lot of talking, browsing and sampling…they finally walked out quite satisfied with their spiritual conquest…they had made a purchase. It was a DVD. A DVD of the film OM SHANTI OM. I wanted to leave my cup of coffee and offer my friendly advice but then I figured…the world WOULD be a better place if we all walked up to people and said, “MIND IT RASKALA!!!”

In Kathmandu I learnt of another strategy employed by Travel Agents and Tour Guides…I found random strangers(Agents) coming up to me and saying, “Hello my friend…you remember me…” Perplexed I would say, “Ahhh….ehh…” To this they would respond…”My friend you are staying in my hotel. I met you yesterday…you want to go sight seeing.” Now since I had just landed that morning in Kathmandu at the end of my trip I did realize that I did not know any of them. So the next time someone came and asked me the same thing, “Hello my friend…you remember me…” I said…”Yes…I am staying at your hotel. You were supposed to give me the change back…I was looking for you yesterday…I tried calling you but it said your phone was off.” I then walked away.


Found Myself discovering the price of True Love

This I think perhaps was by far my best discovery on my trip to Nepal. If you have ever been in love I am sure you have heard someone tell you that they would go to the ends of the earth for you…bring you the moon and even climb the highest mountain for you. I am sure you realized that the Moon story is crap…and the end of the earth does not exist since the world is indeed ROUND. The only thing that is possible is climbing the highest mountain on earth…now that mountain for those of you who are new to this planet is Mt. Everest. I decided to ask my travel agency how I could climb Mt. Everest.

I thought it would be something you could do on the weekend when you find yourself bored in Kathmandu. Apparently NOT. So here's the deal. You need a permit to climb Mt. Everest. This is a government permit that you get with most travel agencies. This costs you $600. You then have to pay an additional $250 garbage deposit which is refundable. This deposit is to ensure that you bring back the stuff you take with you on your climb. This includes your oxygen cylinders and maybe your chocolate wrappers. After all if you are climbing Mt. Everest for love I am sure you will have a heart shaped box of chocolates.

Now that's not all…you also need a Sherpa Guide and porters to carry your equipment to the base camp. A cook can also be arranged at an additional cost. You can buy your equipment or rent it. I would recommend renting since there are very few places in the world where you can use the gear you pick up to go to a place that is usually 50 degree below zero in SUMMER. Having paid for all this equipment you need to then head to base camp which is a 7 day trek. Once you are there, you then start moving to middle camp. Each day you do not climb more than 1000m or your body will not acclimatized to the tinnier air. Once you reach middle camp you need to spend at least a few weeks there getting used to the temperature and thin air. Then…when the weather permits, you need to head to Upper Camp…and then leave at 3 am for the summit of Mt. Everest. Once you are there…it is too cold and windy to ‘hang out’ for too long. You have just enough time to take a photo…but then you realized there is no one else with you…and so you have to take a photo of yourself…this usually means that only your frozen head is visible with your face virtually covered so no one really knows if you were there or not. (Below is what that photo might look like...)You then come down to sea level only to realize that your girlfriend is now married and has two children…


Total bill…$20000. and that’s if you don’t stop to have a cup of tea on the way...The tea will cost you 50 cents if you are a white tourist and another $3 for the map to everest.

Really…not worth it buddy. Just go to the zoo...